It’s like ‘When Harry Met Sally’, but in real life – you were just friends with someone for years and years, you knew all their unsavoury habits, you wished you could fancy them but you never did – until one day, you suddenly do, and by some miracle, they like you too.
So you’ve started dating your best friend, and it’s weird, wonderful and definitely takes some getting used to. You (hopefully) don’t need to have the ‘are we boyfriend and girlfriend? Things progress pretty quickly You’ve been best friends for ten years, so that’s basically like dating for ten years, right?
It’s a sad day when good friends start acting strangely toward you when you’ve found new love.
You’ve been friends for as long as you can remember and have shared intimate details about just about everything that goes on in your lives, but now your friend is acting like you’ve done them wrong. Before you jump to conclusions of “jealousy” and write off your best bud as a fair-weather friend, it’s best to get a handle on what’s going on with them, because there could be more to the picture than you realize.
Sarcastic remarks abound and a cold front blows in. Additionally, new love can be all-consuming, but as a friend, you too have the responsibility to check in with your friends to see what’s going on with them when things seem amiss.
Most times when a friend suddenly starts giving off signals of coldness when you’ve found new love, it indicates that they miss your availability to spend time with them.
Getting to know a new partner is an exciting and all-consuming time-your thoughts, words and actions all seem to revolve around this wonderful person who has rocked your world.
Naturally, the amount of face time you have with your friends has just faced some serious cutbacks.
But you’ve spent many hours with your friends on a regular basis sharing jokes, thoughts, feelings and activities, and now that you’re immersed in the honeymoon-level depths of a new relationship, you’re doing all of that with someone else.
Also, if your friend is single, fear of where his or her life is headed might come into play for them, too.
Single friends may begin to worry how your friendship with them is changing; certainly you now have one less thing in common (being single) with which to share similar thoughts and feelings, and they might wonder if they are being “left behind” in race to find “the One.” That can be a scary prospect since friendship is forged largely on the commonalities we share, and especially when self-worth is often tied in to finding a suitable partner. Did you ask yourself when it was your turn to find the love of your life?
Think back to a time when you were single and one of your friends started seeing someone they thought was the right person for them. Did these feelings make you like your friend any less, or did you just really miss them?
A little empathy can go a long way in understanding how a friend might feel when you find new love.